


Sincerely, D.S.

by DKSculder



Category: The X-Files
Genre: Alternate Universe, F/M, Friendship, MSR
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-14
Updated: 2016-09-27
Packaged: 2018-08-14 22:58:19
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 16,360
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8032321
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DKSculder/pseuds/DKSculder
Summary: It's high school and freshman Dana Scully has a new pen pal, F.M., as a project for her class. Will she ever discover who she's been writing to?





	1. Chapter 1

Dana Scully finished gathering her books and folders that she would need for her first day at this new high school. They had just moved, again, and she was starting all over in the middle of the year. She was always the introvert, who hid behind her studies, and vowed to open herself up a little more with these new surroundings. She had to admit, she loved being in San Diego, she just never liked the adjustment period. She would be at school with her sister, Melissa, not that that found her any comfort. They were close, but complete opposites. She knew Melissa would have no problem fitting right in to her new school, leaving Dana to fend for herself and find her own way. Perhaps that's why Dana always found herself joining science fairs and finding other similar projects to throw herself into, it was easier to have an excuse to hide behind being academically active.

When they made their way to the counselor's office to get acquainted with the administration and collect their school schedule, Melissa had already ran off to talk to a group of students. Dana rolled her eyes and sat in the hallway, waiting for her name to be called. 

"Dana Scully." Mrs. Johnson called out, peering her head from her office. 

"Yeah, that's me." Dana replied, quietly. Mrs. Johnson could already sense that she was a quiet one, and looking at her file, she knew just how to hopefully expand her horizons. 

"Have a seat Dana, I'm Mrs. Johnson, I'll be your counselor for anything you need while you're here. I've set up a class schedule for you, based on courses you've taken previously. I see that you're rather advanced in sciences and math. That's excellent! We have a great physics program here!" Mrs. Johnson exclaimed with a warm smile.

"I am, I've always loved science, and I'm just good at it." Dana shrugged. 

"Perfect, I'll give you the information for the upcoming end of the year science fair as well. I noticed that most of your electives have to do with extra science courses or languages. Have you ever thought about taking an art class or something a little more, creative?" 

"That's not really my thing." Dana said, worried she was going to be placed into courses that she had no interest in taking. 

"Well, it definitely looks great on college applications to have diversity in courses. I know you're only a freshman, but it's never too early to think about sprucing up your transcripts. I have a class I think you'll enjoy. It's technically still a science, just of a different nature. Normally, it's a course for upper class men, but I would make an exception for you. Sociology with Mr. Lopez, think you'd be interested?" Mrs. Johnson asked hopeful. She knew that this was exactly what Dana needed to find her place here. 

"Yeah, fine, whatever." Dana answered passively. She knew that with her counselor's persistence, she wasn't going to waste her breath arguing. She agreed to take the course, and it just so happened to be the first class of the day. Mrs. Johnson dismissed her to head to Room 42, to meet the exuberant Mr. Lopez. 

As she approached, she could hear excited shouting coming from the class that she was supposed to be heading in to. She let out a heavy sigh and opened the door. As she did, she saw some students standing on desks, and who she thought was the teacher, yelling random phrases at them. Some answered quickly, but those that didn't had to take their seat. She began to slowly walk into the room with caution, completely confused by the scene before her. She stopped abruptly as she noticed the teacher pointing at her. 

"Media has an impact on what?" Mr. Lopez asked.

"What?" She asked, taken by surprise.

"Yes, what? That's what I'm asking. I'll give you a second chance to answer, since you're new." He said again. 

As out of her element as she felt, Dana Scully never backed down from a challenge. She noticed that all eyes were on her, still standing in the doorway to the classroom, and didn't want to mess this up. She replayed the question in her head, and knew she read something about it recently in a science journal. 

"Uh, Youth Socialization?" She answered carefully. She noticed the impressed look on Mr. Lopez's face, and a small smile begin on his face.

"Close. _Adolescent_ Socialization. But that could still be counted correctly, judges?" He said, turning his attention back to the rest of the students. Those standing on the tables exchanged silent glances between each other, and one of them nodded towards Mr. Lopez. 

"Jury has it, we will accept that answer. Please take your desk, standing. You're still in this, let's see how well you can do, Miss...?"  Mr. Lopez said excitedly. 

"Uh, Scully. Dana Scully." 

"Well Miss Scully, assume the battle position on your desk. You can have the one in the back corner there." He said, pointing to an empty seat. 

Dana had no idea what she walked into when entering this class, but she found it exhilarating. She got her things situated, and stood on the back corner desk. The questions were fired at them rapidly, and she was actually able to hold her own for a few more rounds. When it got down to the final 3 students, she was one of the ones left standing. She had a smile plastered on her face, this was something she never would have imagined herself to do. She also prided herself for knowing more about sociology than she thought she did. She read enough articles in the science journals that she subscribed to, and actually found it all fascinating. She finally got a question wrong, one that was slightly more abstract than her usual thinking. 

"We had a fantastic match, everyone! You all seem ready enough to at least pass for tomorrow's quiz." Mr. Lopez joked. Just as he finished going over the review for tomorrow, the bell rang, dismissing the class. "Miss Scully, do you have a minute?" 

"Sure." 

"You did well today, I'm impressed. I normally would give you an extension on taking the quiz, since it's your first day, but you seem to know your stuff. Here's the study guide, look it over, if you feel you're not ready, just let me know when you come to class tomorrow." He said, smiling before dismissing her as well. 

The rest of the classes seemed to pale in comparison to how she started her day. Even her science courses that she always loved taking, just didn't capture her ultimate attention. She loved the chance to step out of her norm, and become a new person when she was in her sociology class. That is, after all, what she was hoping to do starting a new school anyway. She found her sister, and they made their way home. She was walking behind the group that Melissa had already melded herself into, and rolled her eyes at their annoying conversations. She noticed another guy running towards them to catch up with the group, and immediately recognized him from Mr. Lopez's class. He instantly joined in with their conversation, and Dana fell further back, until he noticed her. 

"Dana, hey I didn't see you there!" Marcus exclaimed.

"Oh, hi Marcus." She answered timidly. Outside of class, she didn't feel the same courage, and fell back into her introvert persona. 

"How do you know my sister?" Melissa asked, slightly annoyed. 

"She's in my sociology class. She was killin' it today!" He responded, as he winked at Dana. 

"I'm surprised she even talked to anyone, she usually has her nose in a book." Melissa said passively, she was already bored with the conversation. 

"Thanks." Dana said, as she pushed her way to walk faster to their house. She passed the group and briskly made her way home. She was slightly embarrassed, knowing that she would never quite meet the social standards of her sister. Maybe that's why she looked forward to Mr. Lopez's class now, she felt like it was a chance to be someone she wasn't, or someone she was just too afraid to let show. She pulled out her study guide, and got lost in the contents. She couldn't wait for school tomorrow. 

The next day, she cheerfully got ready for school, and her mother noticed a change in her attitude. Normally she had to deal with Dana sulking around, complaining that she hated the new school, every time. She knew her youngest daughter always found it harder to fit in that her sister, but something was different about her now. 

"Honey, how was your first day?" Maggie Scully asked warmly. 

"It was good, I think I'm going to like this semester. My class schedule is pretty full, and I like most of my teachers." Dana answered, trying to mask the excitement running through her. 

"That's great, have you made any new friends already?" Maggie asked. She wanted to know what exactly was putting her daughter in such a great mood. 

"Um, I like the kids in my sociology class, and my lab partner for physics is really nice. I have to go, don't want to be late!" She said as she kissed her mother on the cheek and made her way out the door. She didn't want to disclose anything about her sociology class yet, she wanted to have this be her secret solace. 

She swiftly made her way to Room 42 with a smile on her face, she had never been this excited to go to class before. As she entered, the desks were all scattered, facing different directions. She gave her teacher a puzzled look. 

"I like to see how tempted people are to cheat if you have a possible better view of another student's paper. That's the true test here." He grinned at her as he gestured to her seat in the back. 

The class took the quiz, which was rather short. Dana felt pretty confident after studying the material a little more, and agreed to take the quiz with the rest of the class. When they all turned in their papers and settled in their desks, they looked up to see the writing on the chalkboard. 

"Pen Pals. This is our next project!" Mr. Lopez exclaimed in a funny Dracula accent, trying to make the class excited. "I have a friend who lives on the east coast, and teaches sociology in the small town of Martha's Vineyard. Since you are my only sociology class this semester, you are the lucky test subjects of my newest project." 

"Don't you mean victims?" A student chimed in from the other side of the class, causing a communal chuckle from others. 

"Victims, test subjects, brain washed animals who do whatever their brilliant sociology tells them...whatever you want to call it." Mr. Lopez responded, captivating the class. "It's not as horrible as you may think. I just want you to randomly choose a pen pal from this bowl here. I've already divided the names, so you'll pick one to be your new writing buddy. This is an end of the year project, so you'll have some time to work on the final essay. I want you to craftily write to your new friend, finding out as much information as you can about them. Your approach matters, because you will need to answer these questions that I've listed in the outline. In your final report, I don't just want what sports they play, what their hobbies are, blah blah, I want the reason behind their passions. I want you to know and understand your pen pal enough to tell me why they do what they do. Simply asking them these questions will give you the answers, but actually engaging with them will give you the reason. I also want to know if you think their opinions on subjects may differ from yours because of location, family status, etc." 

"So we're basically writing a profile on these people?" Another student chimed in from the back. 

"Yes, policeman's daughter, in a sense. Like I said, your approach matters. The more in depth you can tell me about your pen pal, the higher the grade. Who's first?" He asked lifting and shaking the bowl in his hand. 

Mr. Lopez made his rounds, and students carefully chose their slips of paper. As Dana opened hers, it just said _F.M._ She gave him a quizzical look, and he grinned at her. 

"I can see some of the puzzled expressions. You don't know your friend's name or gender, for safety reasons, because we care and whatever. So you will sign your letters with your initials, and address your pen pal the same way. I've passed out the outlines, and I suggest you start working on your letters, first one is due tomorrow. Oh, and one more thing. You'll only be exchanging 3 letters each, so make sure they're worth it." Lopez finished passing out the slips, and let the class talk amongst themselves, trying to figure out what to write to their peers. 

Dana sat at her desk, and looked over the outline. The questions were basic enough, but that wasn't the real project. It became even more challenging, given that she didn't have a name to work with, or even know the gender of her unknown partner. She brainstormed ideas and ways to stealthily get the answers she needed, but had no idea where to even start. She figured the best way to open up her pen pal would be to describe small tidbits about herself. She also found the idea intriguing that she could be anyone she wanted to when writing to her mystery friend, someone she would never meet. 

When the bell rang, she shuffled out with the rest of the class, and her day passed by uneventfully. In her other classes, she kept jotting down different notes and questions to include in her letter, and couldn't wait to draft it when she got home. 

She ran inside the house, and bolted straight for her room. She threw her stuff on the floor, and pulled out a piece of paper from her stationary kit that her father had bought for her. It had a small ocean detail on the edges, gender neutral enough. She began to write, and felt that she was being too generous with the details of her life, so she began a new draft. 

_M.F.,_  

_Hello! It's nice to somewhat meet you. I'm not really sure where to begin in telling you about myself, so I'll start with my hobbies. That's probably simple, I don't have many. I usually stick to the academics, and love science. Anything extracurricular I do is usually some kind of project related, or just extra credit for one of my classes. I guess I'm kind of a nerd, but not in the cliche sense of the word. I have a pretty big family, 3 siblings, and we move around a lot, so I don't let myself get too attached to anyone, or anything wherever I currently am. I'm not so much into sports, or anything like that. I usually like to do my own thing, which makes it easy when we do have to just pick up and leave to the next new place. I'm actually looking forward to having a pen pal, someone I can hopefully talk to, who doesn't really know me._

_What things do you like to do? Do you like growing up on the east coast?_

_I am excited to get your letter back!_

_Sincerely, D.S._

Satisfied with this draft, she folded it up and stuck it in the envelope. She didn't want to reveal too much about herself on the first letter, she didn't know how responsive her pen pal would even be, so she kept it generically simple. Dana was excited to turn her letter in tomorrow, and find out just who F.M. was. 

* * *

Fox Mulder made his way to school, hoping to just get by unnoticed. It was a small town, so everyone knew any small piece of information of everyone else's life. Since his sister, Samantha, disappeared when he was 12, most people just whispered as he walked past them in the halls. He never really fit in, and played along to the whole dark and mysterious thing, which is why so many girls were always trying to capture his attention. He didn't pay too much mind to those around him, he just wanted to get out. Going home for him wasn't any better, and he wanted to be as far away from Martha's Vineyard as possible. He was a senior this year, and acceptance letters should be rolling in any day now. He had his eye on Oxford, mostly because of the distance, but also because he was interested in their psychology program. 

After lunch, he headed for his final class for that day, his Sociology class. This was actually his favorite class, considering it had some connection to the field he hoped to study. He was also looking forward to their final project, writing to a pen pal to analyze them and figure out who they are, in just 3 short letters. 

"Alright class, everyone settle down. I just received your first letters from your new pen pal. Remember, your letters in response to theirs are due on Monday. You only have 3 to understand your new friend, so make them count!" Mrs. Cunningham exclaimed excitedly. 

She left the class to work on their lesson for this week, and gave the students a chance to read their first letters. Mulder, as he so insisted that everyone call him, opened up the letter, and immediately assumed his pen pal was a girl, because of the neat handwriting. He read over the words, and smiled at the way his new friend described themselves. He already had questions, but thought it only fair to make an introduction for himself first as well. He also thought he should answer her inquiries, even though there wasn't much to tell. 

He had already finished working on the assignment for class, so he began to draft his response letter. He had to make it count. 

_D.S.,_  

_Hi yourself, don't know who you screwed over in a past life to get me as a pen pal, but welcome to my life. To answer your questions, I don't mind growing up on the east coast, it's all I've ever known. Small towns tend to suck when everyone is in everyone else's business though. There isn't much that I do either, extracurricular wise. I'm definitely not a science geek, like yourself, and I do enjoy playing baseball, but other than that, there isn't much to tell. It must be fun moving around so much, I would love to not have to stay in the same place for that long. A few years ago, I wish I had the option to move away, but hopefully I will again soon. Just waiting on some college letters to come my way so I can find out where I'm taking the first plane out to. You do have a big family! It's only me, really, mom and dad are divorced. My sister went missing when I was younger, so it's pretty much been just me since then. That's probably a lot to include in a first letter, but I'm trying to help you out here, we only get 3. I am actually looking forward to this project, since you don't even know my name, I feel like you could be the best friend I have to tell anything I want to. Plus, it'll be a great start to my career in psychology, or at least I hope. Consider yourself my first client._

_I'm looking forward to your letter back._

_Later, F.M._

He re-read his letter several times, knowing he was disclosing a lot to a complete stranger, but was that any different than going to a psychologist like his parents forced him to after Samantha's abduction? His teacher had watched him struggle throughout the year, and pulled him to the side to let him know that she thought this would be a great project for him. At the time, he rolled his eyes, but now he realized maybe she was right. They had to get to know each other for the grade, so he might as well take the opportunity to pour his heart out to someone he would never meet, while he had the chance. 

Satisfied, he folded the letter in thirds, and stuffed it into the envelope provided for them. He addressed the outside to 'D.S.,' and hoped he didn't scare them off too much already with just one letter. He didn't get much from their first letter, so he was looking forward to their second. 

* * *

Dana had been adjusting rather well during her first month at the new school. She had her apprehensions when she first started, but that first day in Mr. Lopez's sociology class changed everything. Since it was the only one he was teaching this semester, they became a small family. She started talking to Marcus more while walking home with the rest of the group as well. She could feel herself coming out of her comfort zone, but the thought didn't terrify her as much as she thought it would. 

When she arrived to class, she noticed an envelope sitting on her desk. The other students had them as well, and they instantly began to question their teacher. 

"Oh come on, don't tell me you already forgot about your project. Your first letters from your pen pal's arrived yesterday. This means your next one is due Wednesday!" Mr. Lopez exclaimed, returning to his lesson on the board. 

All the students began to frantically open their letters, wondering just who was on the other side of their exchanges. Dana opened hers and instantly assumed she was talking to a guy, because of the messier handwriting than her own. As she began to read the letter, her heart begin to sink at the loneliness she could feel just from reading their words. She could tell that they tried to hide a lot of their pain with humor, and might even try to act as if nothing was wrong. She knew exactly what that felt like. She smiled when she read the part about being best friends, it's almost as she had felt as well. She wanted to be able to put everything in her letters that she never could say out loud to anyone. There was no risk in telling a complete stranger, because they couldn't judge her if they didn't truly know her. 

Everyone began discussing their letters, and talking about what they already thought about their writing partner. Some people said that the letter told them nothing, others received novel length letters and were excited to learn so much about their new friend. Dana knew she was interested in talking more to F.M., and needed to uncover more about their life. The rest of the class was spent drafting their responses. 

When she arrived home, she pulled out the beginning draft of her letter, and her feelings came pouring out. 

_F.M.,_

_It was great to get your letter! I wouldn't say I screwed over anyone to have you as my writing partner, I'm looking forward to getting your next letter. I'm sure you hear this a lot, but I'm so sorry to hear about your sister, that must have been tough. I couldn't even imagine losing one of my siblings, and she was all you had. I'm also sorry you feel like you're alone, but you don't have to be anymore, that's what I'm here for. That is, if you're okay talking to a science geek, as you so nicely put it. You can't even begin to imagine how much it actually sucks to move around so much. I guess given your circumstances, it wouldn't be the worst idea, but when you're just trying to be a normal kid, it's absolutely horrible. Dad's military, and as much as I love traveling, I wish we could just settle in one place. I've had to constantly adjust to new schools and new people, so it's hard for me to make friends. I guess that's why this is cool, I get to have a friend, regardless of the location. I never fit in as easily as my sister does at school, I'm always the youngest one in a group, and I get outcasted a lot. I think I became used to not attaching myself to anything so that it doesn't hurt so much when it's taken all away again. That might make for a bad outlook on life, but I guess that would be something for you to tell me oh wise psychologist in training. I've already figured you're older than me, if you're waiting on college acceptance letters to be coming in. I hope you get in to whatever college is your top choice, you deserve it._

_I don't really know what else to tell you about myself, I'm sure you have the same assignment we do, but I don't think there's anything really interesting about me. I'm pretty straightforward in my thinking, and very logical. I don't like to keep my head in the clouds, hoping for things that are unattainable. I tend to play things safe, because that's what I'm comfortable doing. I've always been the 'perfect child,' and I'm getting kind of tired of that title, but I'm too scared to shake it. This all makes me sound really lame, so sorry if that doesn't help add anything exciting to your paper._

_I'm excited for your response._

_Sincerely, D.S._

Dana folded her letter neatly, and placed it in the envelope. She already was excited to read F.M.'s next letter, even if they hadn't received hers yet. She almost didn't want this to be just an assignment, and hoped to continue writing them after this was over. She scoffed at the idea, and scolded herself for thinking that a senior would want anything to do with a freshman. She had taken their words sincerely though, and knew that her final letter would have to be the most heartfelt. She would never talk to this person again, and wanted to make it worth her while. 

* * *

Mulder excitedly made his way to his sociology class that afternoon, knowing they should be getting their letters from their pen pals today. He didn't realize how much he was actually looking forward to their response. He was also excited to tell them that he got accepted to Oxford, and couldn't wait to get out of this town. When the students shuffled into the small classroom, he noticed a large envelope sitting on Mrs. Cunningham's desk. He suspected those must be the letters, and was anxious to open them. 

Class dragged on as they took a pop quiz and she began her lesson. He was almost sure that the letters had arrived, but didn't want to question it. When he realized there was only 5 minutes left of class and everyone began to gather their things, he became disappointed. He let out a heavy sigh and began to throw his books into his backpack. 

"Oh! I almost forgot, before you go, I have your letters! Please come up to my desk and find yours on your way out." Mrs. Cunningham said, distracted. 

Mulder's mood instantly changed as he swiftly made his way towards the front. He found the envelope with his initials on it, written in the already familiar writing. He smiled as he made his way home to open his letter. 

After arriving home and locking himself up in his room, he grabbed the envelope from his bag and began to read it. He smiled as he read over their words, and could sense a wit to their tone. He was instantly intrigued to find out more about the seemingly closed off D.S. He found it amusing that he had been partnered with someone who was the complete opposite of him, in every sense. Though somehow, he felt like this person understood him better than anyone had before. He pulled out his pen, and began to write. 

_D.S.,_

_You're lucky I don't have too much of a reputation to ruin, being friends with a science geek now. Thank you, for your sentiments, they really aren't necessary, but I do appreciate them. It was a long time ago, but I've never given up hope that we'll find her. I have some outlandish theories on what happened to her, and I think that's how I've become so isolated myself growing up. I guess it does suck that you have to move around so much, I never thought of having to start all over all the time. I wish I could do it, just once, to get away from here. That actually might become a possibility if everything goes as planned. I got my acceptance letter today, to my top school. I couldn't wait to tell you about it. The school is overseas and I couldn't be more excited to be that far away. I'm still planning to study psychology, I don't know why, I just find it intriguing, much like I find you. You shouldn't let the fear of becoming too attached take over showing people who you are though. They'd be lucky to get to know you better._

_I don't think you're uninteresting at all, I find you fascinating. Maybe it's because you think so different from me. I've always been the one known to have some crazy idea or theory about everything, but you are the complete opposite of that. I think that's cool. I think we would make a good balance, if we actually knew each other in person. Sometimes, I wish we did, you're easy to talk to, even if it is just on paper._

_Thanks for having hope that I would get into my top choice, I think it made a difference._

_Talk to you soon, F.M._

He couldn't figure out why this somewhat anonymous person was so easy to talk to, but whenever he found himself responding to their letter, the words just came pouring out. He instantly slipped into a somber mood, thinking he would only receive one more letter from them. He already knew that the final letter would be something he held onto forever. 

* * *

As the final weeks of the year approached, Dana felt like a new person. She had taken F.M.'s advice and broke away slightly from her timid shield that she put up so well. She made more friends than just the ones she was partnered with, and actually was enjoying herself. She was looking forward to the rest of high school, whatever it may bring. 

She made her way to sociology, bright and early, and found another letter on her desk. She quickly opened it and began reading it, since she was early, she had time before class actually started. She smiled at the sincerity of the words, and instantly felt excited for her new friend's great news. She finished the letter, smile still plastered on her face. She didn't want this to end, and was nervous about writing her final letter. 

"I'm sure you've noticed your letters on your desk, your next one is due Thursday. It is your final letter, so if you don't know the deep depths of your pen pal's soul, you are already failing." Mr. Lopez said dramatically. "I also hope you've had enough to at least think about begin writing your final papers. Given the timeline works out accordingly, I'm going to set the due date for those three weeks from tomorrow." 

The class groaned at the idea of having to write the final paper, but Dana had already began working on hers. She didn't think her new friend was easy to comprehend, by any means, but she had an understanding of him. She knew she could be way off, but it's what she absorbed from his letters. After class was dismissed, she had a free period, so she took the time to begin drafting her final letter. She spent the next hour writing and then crumpling draft after draft. She wanted her final letter to be perfect. She mentally chuckled to herself, that's exactly what she was trying to break away from. 

When she finally made it home, she ran upstairs to her room, and began to write. 

_F.M._

_I'm sure you'll make fun of me for being a perfectionist, but I've drafted this letter so many times. I wanted my final one to be something you could always hold onto, as cheesy at that sounds. You may be tossing these as you read them, but something tells me you cherish things stronger than others. It's a quality I like about you. I'm so excited for you that you got into your top school! You'll get a taste of traveling and settling into a new area. I took your advice and stopped letting fear take over. I've made quite a few more friends, and I'm not as scared to become attached here. I guess I owe that to you. Looks like your psychology skills are already working. Not that I ever doubted your abilities. I'm actually going to miss writing you, because I think you're easy to talk to as well._

_It's sweet that you think I'm fascinating, it's not exactly a term I've ever been labeled before. I think you're right though, about us being a good balance. It's amazing to me that we are so opposite, yet somehow, we just connect. I've had a lot of fun writing to you._

_I wanted to make this letter meaningful, but I think I'm failing at that. I just want you to know that I will always have hope in your ability to be great at whatever you decide to do. Just know that whatever journey you find yourself on, you'll always have a friend in me. Good luck in everything that you do in life, and have fun in college next year._

_Sincerely, D.S._

She smiled to herself, and sealed the letter in the final envelope. She wished this wasn't the last contact she had with her pen pal, but knew it was only a project. She had never expected to open up to someone that easily before, and would truly miss the connection. Now all she could do was wait for their final letter.

* * *

As Mulder turned in his final test, Mrs. Cunningham handed him an envelope. He immediately recognized the writing and smiled to himself. He quietly took his seat while some of the other students finished, and read over the words. He was touched by how sincere their letter was, and realized writing his final one was going to be harder than he thought. 

After class they were told they only had 2 days to write their final letter and finish their report for the sociology project. He rushed home to work on both, but the letter was the most important to him. 

_D.S.,_

_I'll be holding onto all of your letters, because they're from a friend. I'm really bummed this is our last letter to each other, I will miss talking to you. It's funny, I actually went into this assignment weary of the idea, but it turned out great in the end. I'm glad I was able to help, although I wouldn't always recommend taking my advice, it'll only eventually get you into trouble. I probably shouldn't say that, I'm going to ruin my psych rep already._

_You didn't fail, your words always mean something to me. I think I'll always find you fascinating, because you're unknown to me, and that's where my fondness grows. I think what I learned from you the most was that people come back from hardships. You have to move around so much, but you always just find a way to adjust. I think I sulked in my feelings for so long that I turned down the idea of moving forward from the bad things that happened in my life. I hope to take that with me, and put that energy towards doing something more for myself._

_It's nice to know I'll always have a friend on my journey, no matter how far away. I know you probably don't believe in it, but if fate has plans for us, I'm sure we'll speak again one day. You really have been a great friend, and I'm glad to have had the privilege to know you on some level. I wish you the same luck in life, and don't forget to put down the textbook and open your mind a little now and then._

_Until next time, F.M._

Satisfied, he sealed his final envelope. He was sad that this was his final contact with D.S., but knew he had gained a lot from just 3 short letters. He would keep them all together, to read when he really needed them. They were almost like a security blanket for him now. He had never really had the acceptance and reassurance that he was doing good things in his life, from anyone. He supposed it's because his pen pal didn't really know him, but on some level, they knew him more than anyone. He reveled in this small happiness that he was able to find, not just from words on a paper, but from whoever it was that wrote them. 

* * *

It was three days before their final paper was due, and Dana was nervous to receive her final letter. She had already pretty much finished her essay, but something was missing from it. She didn't know if she was nervous about reading what F.M. wrote, or what they responded to her letter. She tried to make it special, but she was never good at expressing how she felt. She hoped they understood how much their exchanges indirectly helped her. 

When she was handed her final envelope, she opened it carefully. As she perused over their words, she smiled. They had helped each other. She was saddened as soon as she realized there was no need to respond, and that she wouldn't be receiving any more either. She let out a melancholy sigh, and put her letter in her folder for safe keeping. She would be holding onto these, to bring a smile to her face whenever she needed it. They gave her hope. 

She had everything she needed to finish up her essay now. The one thing she struggled with was figuring out how to describe the passion behind F.M.'s decisions in life, but they had so clearly stated it for her. Her final report was filled with the colorful description of her complex pen pal. When she received the grade for it, she knew that her understanding of them was probably more than Mr. Lopez could have hoped for. She got a perfect score, but that wasn't even what mattered to her the most. The ultimate takeaway from this project was that she had made a life friend, in such a short period of time. Even if she never spoke to them again, she knew they were always out there, rooting for her. Just as she was for them. She hoped that one day she would be able to open up her mind and believe that fate would bring them together again. 


	2. Chapter 2

As Dana Scully prepared for her meeting with Chief Blevins today, she was mentally psyching herself out about her abilities to be a field agent. She had been with the bureau for just over 2 years, but this was her first active assignment. She was still unsure of what exactly was expected of her, and that uncertainty began to tug at her nerves. She had made a lot of decisions, that led her to this point in her life, and she was always good at adjusting to new surroundings. 

When she reflected back on her career course, she wasn't sure how she veered so far from actually studying physics. She used to have such a high passion for sciences, ever since high school, but thought she would be able to distinguish herself in the FBI. She struggled to gain respect in her fields, first in medical school, then through training at the academy. She was used to adjusting, so that was never the issue. Dana always found the difficulty in becoming acquainted with her peers. She had made friends, and mistakes, along the way, but didn't want to risk making those same mistakes going into this new assignment. She looked at her reflection in the mirror, and nodded at the professional persona that she was maintaining. She was ready for today, but needed just some final words of wisdom to make it through her day. 

She went to find her old journal in the top drawer of her bedside dresser. Dana pulled out an old, almost faded piece of paper, and read through the words of encouragement. She smiled to herself, knowing that if she lost her courage at some point today, her friend would be holding it for her, wherever they were. 

_I wish you the same luck in life, and don't forget to put down the textbook and open your mind a little now and then._

She chuckled, thinking that F.M. would find it most fascinating that that's exactly what she did when she chose the FBI over practicing medicine. She had her nose in a book for so long, that changing things completely was what she needed the most to find herself. She remembered these words when she was first approached about her recruitment, and knew that by some weird twist of events, this was the best decision for her. F.M. would say it was fate, but that's not something she herself believed in. She just felt it in her heart that this was the path she was supposed to find herself on. 

After her meeting with Blevins, she became weary of her new assignment as she made her way down to the basement office to meet her new partner. She had heard of Fox Mulder, only by reputation, and new she was in for an interesting new journey. Her first instinct was to shield herself, so that she could maintain a professional relationship, and not even be tempted to make the same mistakes as she did in medical school, and at the academy. Upon that thought, she had another, and smiled to herself. 

_You shouldn't let the fear of becoming too attached take over showing people who you are though. They'd be lucky to get to know you better._

She was just going to take this as it was, and see what happens. She didn't want fear to cloud her judgements, and tried so desperately to have an open mind about the current assignment. She took a deep breath, and knocked on the basement door before entering. As she slowly made her way inside, she observed her surroundings. She could instantly sense that Agent Mulder's ideas and outlooks on life differed so immensely from her own. They made their introductions, and as he presented his slideshow, she had a feeling of excitement wash over her. She had never met him, but something told her that she was going to enjoy this more than she had originally thought. Her apprehensions were pushed aside even further as they began discussing the case, and an odd sense of familiarity clouded her mind. 

"When convention and science offer us no answers, might we not finally turn to the fantastic as a plausibility?" Mulder challenged. 

Dana was already exasperated with him, but in a positive way. She hadn't had someone who challenged her belief in science, or even questioned it, since high school. She knew that Agent Mulder was testing her, to see how well she would do in his field of study, as well as possibly trying to scare her off. She never backed down from what was presented before her, and wanted to gain his respect.  

"What I find fantastic is any notion that there are answers beyond the realm of science. The answers are there. You just have to know where to look." She said with confidence in her answer. She watched the slight impressed look pass over his face, and knew she was playing this just right.

* * *

As they made their way through Oregon, Mulder could sense something from his new tiny partner. She was intrigued by what was happening to these people, but wasn't completely willing to believe in the unexplained just yet. He could see her holding onto her science as safety blanket, and smiled to himself at her persistence. When he was first informed that he would be obtaining a partner, he immediately suspected that they were trying to get rid of the x files, the project he so passionately threw himself into. When he first discovered them, it wasn't anything he was specifically looking to further investigate, but the fascination took over. His need for finding out the truths of these unexplained cases increased, and he vowed to find the answers to as many of these unsolved cases as he was able to. 

_I hope to take that with me, and put that energy towards doing something more for myself._

These words ran through his mind when the x files first became a possibility. It was a promise he made to himself, and his friend, so long ago. He wanted to keep this promise, for both of them, and smiled at the irony of the situation. He was basing his judgements to further explore the unknown, based on a pledge to an unknown friend. He was apprehensive at first, because of the negative feedback he received when first approaching the idea to take over this unassigned unit, but knew that someone out there believed in him enough for him to succeed. 

_I just want you to know that I will always have hope in your ability to be great at whatever you decide to do. Just know that whatever journey you find yourself on, you'll always have a friend in me._

He smiled at these thoughts, thinking that D.S. would find it so amusing that he chose this journey to be on. He thought of how they would challenge his belief in these cases, but never disrespect it. Sometimes he wished he knew his ambiguous friend in person, and had them there to consult when he really needed it, but that's what those letters were for. He kept them folded up thinly, and placed in the frame, behind the picture of his sister. They were the two things he cherished the most, and what drove him to fight for his work every day. 

Their first case had already been eventful, and they were both trying to maintain their own theories, and argue the other to see their viewpoint. They differed in opinions on practically everything, but it wasn't as frustrating as they might have thought. Somehow, they had a good balance, and they both found some comfort in those feelings.

That second night, Scully made her way, shaken, into Mulder's room. She swore that she had become part of this case, finding similar markings to the victims on her lower back. The panic inside of her began to build, and her first thought was to run to Mulder for comfort. She was nervous about exposing herself so much to him, but needed the reassurance. She dropped her robe, so that he could examine her back, and insured her that she was fine. She wasn't as uncomfortable as she thought she would have been, and found him calming in that moment. He was taken back by her actions, but found it endearing that she was willing to show her vulnerability to him. That small sentiment is what caused him to open up about his sister to her, after only knowing her for such a short time. 

His sister was something he rarely talked about, to anyone. He never trusted people enough to show his weakness, thinking that they would eventually just use it against him. There was something about his new partner that he found complacent, almost familiar. He felt no apprehensions spilling his heart out and explaining how he came to be on this journey. The only worry he had was that she would pass judgement on him, but she just listened. He had never found it so easy to talk to someone before, at least not in a long time. 

* * *

As their cases went on, Mulder and Scully's bond grew. Both of them were caught off guard by how quickly they were able to adjust to each other, but never questioned it. Sure, they had arguments about theories, and Mulder was so far gone in his own world that he often left Scully behind, but it's what built their dynamic. Scully was always there for him, just as he was for her.

They had faced plenty of obstacles along the way, and neither were being honest with how they felt about the other. Both agents valued their partnership, and growing personal friendship, and didn't want to jeopardize that. They had made it through disagreements, and a jealous rift when Phoebe Green, Mulder's blast from the past, blew her way through like the storm that she was. Regardless of the situation, they always knew that the other was there for them. The trust had also grown between them, and it was something that would be hard to be broken. 

They were working on the Tooms case again, and Mulder was apprehensive, considering what happened the last time they were dealing with this monster. He had shown up at the perfect time to help Scully barely escape his grasp. It was during that case that they both fought for their partnership, in different ways. Having to work on the case again, their connection only grew, recalling their first instances. 

"Fox..." Scully began to say, before stopping at the chuckling happening next to her.

"I - I even made my parents call me Mulder. So, Mulder." He said, smiling at her. 

"Mulder, I wouldn't put myself on the line for anybody but you." She said sincerely. He took a moment to look at her, and could read the truth behind her statement in her eyes. He wasn't ready to face any further feelings, working on 3 days worth of lack of sleep, so he briskly humored his way away from that conversation. 

"If there's an ice tea in that bag, could be love." He said jokingly, not realizing in his mind how much he hoped it were actually true.

"Must be fate, Mulder. Root beer." She said with a small smile touching her lips. He could sense the worry she felt for him radiating from her, and finally agreed to go home and get some rest. He was weary about leaving her alone, given what happened last time, but knew she was right. 

It was on his drive home that their conversation began to turn in his head. Suddenly, their exchanges all began to blend together, pointing to one specific detail that he felt like an idiot for not realizing sooner. His eyes grew wide as he sped up to get back to his apartment.

When he arrived home, he barely remembered to close the door behind him, rushing for the picture frame that sat on his desk. He opened the back end of it, and pulled out the letters that he could already recite verbatim. As he read over them again, he cursed himself for not recognizing it sooner. He went in search of one of their recent reports, and held both papers side by side in examination. Her handwriting had changed slightly, but it was no mistake that D.S. was none other than Dana Scully, his partner. 

Mulder's thoughts were sporadic, as he tried to piece everything together. His exhaustion was lost on him, as the adrenaline from these revelations kicked in. He was pacing in his apartment, trying to figure out what to do about this situation. It never dawned on him why he felt so comfortable with Scully, it just happened. He didn't want to question it, because she had become one of the best friends he's had since, well, since her. He read the letters that her high school self wrote, with new eyes. He smiled at her description of herself, and reveled in the fact that not so much has changed. He always wanted to meet the person on the end of these exchanges, but never believed he actually would. 

He needed a plan of action, he didn't think he could just be in her presence, knowing what he knows, and not act on it. He didn't want to bluntly tell her, he knew that if he were to stay in true Mulder fashion, he would need to think of a clever way to tell her. He played through their last exchange, and smiled to himself deviously. He had concocted a plan to let her into this little insight that he discovered, and just hoped that she would take it with as much stride as he did.

With that thought, he instantly began to worry. He didn't know if it was only himself that held onto these letters with such a special place in his soul. She could very well have forgotten about them along the years, and would not even know what he was referring to. He began to psych himself out about his plan, but something inside reassured him that she at least would remember. Whether she held onto them with the same sentiment as he did, would be a discovery they both would have to wait to uncover. 

The next day, Mulder wanted to put his plan into action, but knew the case was a priority on everyone's mind at the moment. He would have to push aside his personal feelings, so that they could solve this. They had some difficulties throughout the case, but in their own dramatic fashion, they were able to eventually close it. It had been days since Mulder first made his realizations, and now that the case was over, he knew it was time to clue Scully in on his little secret. 

She knew he was worried about losing the x files, and let out a heavy sigh as she found him outside, gazing up at a tree. She walked over to him to grab his attention so that they could leave. She wanted to get him away from the mess they had found themselves in recently, and hopefully take his mind off his worries. 

"It's amazing how things change, isn't it?" He asked cryptically. 

"The caterpillar?" She asked, looking up in the direction that held his eyes, confused as to what he was talking about. 

"No, a change for us. It's coming." He said with certainty. She was sure that he was talking in relation to the x files, but the look in his eyes made her question that. 

"How do you know?" She inquired with growing interest. 

"A hunch." He said with a sly smile before turning to leave. She was confused as to what he meant, but didn't want to investigate it in this moment. 

She knew Mulder dealt with things in his own way, and the most she could do, was only be there for him. In extreme instances, she would reel him back in when he really needed it, but this wasn't one of those times. She sensed that he had a lot of things on his mind, but he didn't seem upset about them, so she let it be. 

The next day, she made her way to the office, and noticed that it was still locked. Her brow furrowed in confusion as she read the small note on the door. 

_Took a personal day. Talk to you later._

_M_

Her anxiety began to build, along with her uneasiness about Mulder's recent disposition. She could tell he had been deep in his thoughts throughout the remainder of the Tooms case, but just assumed it was in relation to the work. She didn't know what would cause him to have to take a personal day. She let out a heavy sigh as she began to settle into the office before attempting to call him to check in. As she hung up her jacket and purse, she noticed an envelope on the desk. 

She approached with suspicion, and her heart began to beat rapidly as she noticed that it was addressed to 'D.S.' She calmed herself down, and chastised herself for overreacting. She knew they were her initials, but seeing them addressed as they were, on the outside of an envelope, brought so many emotions back to her. She picked up the envelope with a shaky hand, and pulled out a letter written on notebook paper. 

As she opened the letter, she let out an audible gasp, and her hand shot up to cover her mouth in overwhelming surprise. 

_D.S.,_

_Must be fate._

_See you soon, F.M._

She was so taken back by the words on paper, that she had to re-read them several times to comprehend what they said. Her mind was whirling as she thought about what this meant. She was so lost in her thoughts, that she completely missed the can of root beer sitting next to where the envelope lay on the desk. Upon seeing the drink, everything began to piece together. She was in such a complete shock from receiving the letter, that she ignored the simple implication that it held. 

Mulder was F.M., plain and simple. Her mind began to replay their partnership so far, and she was amazed that she never picked up on it sooner. Of course, they never called each other by their first names, so it was nothing that they would have so easily came to a conclusion on. She let a small smile touch her lips in thinking that's why she's always found him fascinating to work with. He challenged her, not just in her ideas, but in allowing herself to open herself up to extreme possibilities. She let out a small chuckle, thinking that he was right, in his belief in fate. 

She managed to compose herself enough to gather her things again, and head straight for Mulder's apartment. 

* * *

Mulder had put his plan to tell Scully in action, and was waiting anxiously for her to find his letter. He was pacing around his apartment, attempting to find things to preoccupy his mind. When he looked at the clock, he noticed the time, and thought she must have made it to the office by now. He was expecting her call immediately, but after several more minutes of staring at the phone, it never came. He began to worry that she would just see the letter as a follow up from their conversation several days ago, and dismiss it. They were, after all, just their initials. If she didn't hold onto what Mulder felt was their first true connection, she wouldn't have made the inference of his letter. 

He began to sulk in his own negative thoughts, and figured he should go for a run to clear some of his energy. He dressed quickly and made his way out of his apartment building, beginning to jog down the street, missing Scully pulling up in the opposite direction by only a few seconds. 

She sauntered up to his apartment, and knocked several times, each going without a response. Her nerves began to get the best of her as she mulled over the idea that maybe she had gotten this all wrong. There might have been a giant misunderstanding on her part, and maybe she was just wishful thinking. Scully played over everything that happened between them recently, in correlation with the recent letter and root beer, and instantly scolded herself for adding personal feelings to this mundane situation. She figured Mulder was just reiterating their conversation from a few nights ago, and just addressing it with their initials. It's not like people's initials are important, unless you give them meaning, as she had. She groaned, and leaned her head on his apartment door, feeling like an idiot for thinking this was something more. 

She took a deep breath and unlocked his apartment, letting herself inside. She figured things were fine, but would give herself some reassurance if she just checked. She crept in slowly, observing her surroundings, and nothing seemed out of place. She called his name out a few times, but it became even more apparent that he wasn't there. As she was beginning to leave, something slightly out of place caught her eye. She noticed that Samantha's picture had been moved from the desk to the coffee table, and it looked like the frame had been tampered with. 

Scully slowly walked over to pick it up for examination, and noticed that there were papers shoved messily between the picture and the back of the frame. Curious, she pulled the papers out, and her heart rate began to increase. She wasn't wrong, she understood Mulder's message loud and clear. In her hands were her own letters that she wrote her freshman year of high school. 

She fell back onto the couch behind her, and just stared in a daze at the 3 letters in her hand. She read them, and rolled her eyes at her 15-year-old self, and smiled at the memories. She was so lost in her thoughts, that she hadn't realized how long she had been sitting here, still in complete awe of the situation. 

"You know, breaking and entering is a chargeable offense." Mulder said, causing Scully to jump. She hadn't realized that he had come back, and he was more surprised to see her there in person. When he arrived home, he noticed that his door was unlocked, and immediately put himself on alert. He entered quietly, and saw Scully sitting on his couch, holding her own letters in her hand in awe. He smiled to himself, knowing they were now both clued in on their secret solace. 

"Jesus, Mulder. You scared me." She hissed, still calming herself down.

"Sorry." He chuckled at how rattled she became. He walked towards her, and leaned his shoulder against the wall. "So whatcha doin' here, Scully? Come to play hooky with me?" He joked, wagging his eyebrows at her. He wasn't sure how to approach this situation, uncertain about her feelings on the recent revelation, so he humored himself. 

"I - uh, got your note. Both of them." She said quietly, not making eye contact with him. She was still staring at the letters in her hands, and started to grow annoyed, mulling over the facts in her mind. "Mulder, how long have you known?" She asked with an accusing tone in her voice. She stood up, facing him and gripped the papers tighter in her hand. 

"Scully, I just figured it out, I swear." He said with his hands up in surrender. He could tell she was frustrated, because it's exactly how he felt when he first made the discovery. It wasn't a frustration at the truth, it was the fact that they didn't figure it out sooner.

"How did you even - this can't be real." She said with a resigned sigh. 

"I don't know how I figured it out, it just all sorta pieced itself together. At first, I didn't even believe it either, but then I compared your handwriting, and it just made sense." He said with a shrug. "Is it so bad to meet your loner pen pal from high school?" He said teasing her, trying to ease the mood.

"No, as long as you're still okay being friends with a science geek." She answered with a smirk on her face. 

"Well it's definitely put a mark on my reputation, but I'll manage." He said, answering her smirk with his own.

"I just, how did we never figure this out before? We spend almost every day together." She said, still amazed by the situation as it was unfolding. 

"I don't know, sometimes the hardest things for us to see are those that are right in front of us?" 

"Some more psychological wisdom?" She asked, with her eyebrow beginning to rise. 

"I'll always have a special place in my heart for my first client." He said, feigning to be touched by the memories. 

Scully stiffened for a moment, pondering over his words. He didn't know how much he truly helped her to get this far in life. Whenever she needed any kind of courage, she found them in his letters. When she decided to make the career change, she felt like no one was rooting for her, except for her lost friend. She didn't know if she was ready to express just how much he had done for her, far before he even knew her. 

"I - uh, Mulder, why did you keep them?" She asked quietly, her head bowed, avoiding his eyes. 

He froze, not knowing how to answer. Based on how she asked, he could sense that she had kept at least one herself, and wanted to know if it held the same esteem for him. He wanted to tell her exactly why he kept them, and how often he read them. After he left for college, he felt ultimately alone. It was different than how he felt at home, because at least he had familiar faces around him there. This was a new place, and completely new surroundings. He almost changed his mind, until he remembered how brave he found it that she moved around so much, and always managed to adjust. He knew he would never truly be alone, as long as his friend was out there. 

"I told you I would." He said with a shrug, trying to void the emotion from his voice. 

She stayed silent for a moment in response. She could instantly tell that he wasn't ready to talk about what this meant for them either. It was something that they would need to work up to, but it made them both feel so much closer connected than before. She was getting anxious, and wanted to spare them both some awkwardness, so she began to make her exit. She stopped before him, and leaned in to give him a hug, wrapping her arms around his waist. It only took him a moment to comprehend what was happening, before enclosing his arms around her. 

"Thank you." She whispered before glancing up at him. They both just held each other's gaze, basking in their truth. He leaned down, and placed a soft kiss on her forehead, sealing their unspoken sentiments. 

Neither of them could envision what this discovery would mean for their relationship, but they now knew, more than ever, that whatever happened, they would always have each other. Perhaps Mulder was right after all, fate did have a plan for them.


	3. Chapter 3

It had been several months since their discovery, and the new revelations helped them settle even more into their partnership. They hadn't addressed this epiphany that they shared together, but they both felt it brought them closer. He knew she put up with a lot, and had to wonder if it was because of how closely they've always felt to each other's heart. 

They've done a lot for each other in their partnership, and felt like they had a bond and dedication to each other. They worked as if the other was just half of a whole, and their personal friendship only grew stronger. 

It wasn't until Scully was abducted by the madman, better known as Duane Barry, that Mulder truly felt how strongly they were connected. 

He fought hard to find her, and get to her in time, and felt like he failed them both when he was too late. As much as her mother and sister tried to talk to him, he felt like a huge part of his soul was missing. The guilt he felt flowing through him overtook his mental stability, and he felt like he was losing himself more every day that she was gone. 

He desperately needed something to keep the feeling of their connection alive, and he pulled out her letters from their sacred, special place in the frame that held his sister's picture. He read them several times, and had to swallow the lump in his throat, fighting back his emotions. These letters, as much as they carried him through his biggest life challenges to this point, wasn't sufficing for this moment in time. 

Mulder lifelessly dragged himself to Scully's apartment, needing the closeness of her surrounding him. Her family was slowly losing faith, and he couldn't let that final strand of hope die. He slowly made his way inside, and could see small objects still thrown astray from her struggle when she was taken. He closed his eyes, and let out a heavy sigh. He shakily began to pick up the items, and put them back in their place. 

Being in her sanctuary made him feel slightly closer to her. He didn't want to invade her privacy too much, but he needed some reassurance to keep his hope alive. He made his way to her bedroom, and froze at the doorway. He knew he shouldn't be here, but his selfishness in the moment overpowered him. He sat on her bed, and just reveled in his surroundings. 

He noticed all the small things in the room that made it so unbelievably her. He smiled to himself, and enjoyed this moment into her personal space. He noticed a small journal tucked between her bed and her nightstand, and picked it up, cradling it gently in his hand. He ran his hand over the cover, allowing his fingers to graze the outside with feather soft touches. He had apprehensions about reading it, but needed to ease his mind, and feel linked to her in some small way.

He flipped open the first page, and noticed it was dated as the first day she began working on the x files with him. He froze, reading the very first line of her entry. 

_F.M.,_

He sat in disbelief, seeing that her journal entry was addressed to the all too familiar pen pal name he assumed in high school. He began to frantically flip through the pages, and noticed that every entry was addressed to F.M. The small smile on his face began to grow into a full grin, and he began to read several inscriptions. 

Mulder was completely blown away by how much Scully trusted this persona, that she addressed her deepest thoughts to him. He smiled as he read about how she felt about their growing partnership, and how must trust and devotion they had established. Any doubt that clouded his mind was slowly diminishing. He realized that there were less recent entries, and let out a heavy sigh as he read one of the latest. 

_F.M.,_

_It seems in bad taste to complain about you, to you, but I don't have much of a choice at the moment. You are absolutely exasperating, and I have been so worried about you. Since they separated us, I feel like we've both been lost. You've managed to run off on your latest lead, and I'm terrified. I hate the distance, because I don't have your back. I'm trying to find you, I will do what is necessary to bring you back, bring you back to me, to our work. I know we aren't partners anymore, but you will always be the most important person in my life. We are connected, Mulder, regardless of our current status. I will find you._

_D.S._

He re-read the entry, and embraced her words. He figured it was from his excursion in Puerto Rico, and remembered the effort she put forth to find him. He was beginning to lose hope, along with her family, about her return, but this is what he needed to push through. He closed the journal, and held it gently in his hands. It was an unspoken promise that she would never give up on him, and he fully intended to return those sentiments. He put the journal in its original place, and vowed to find her. 

As more time passed, he slipped into a dark place. He knew he needed to be reigned in, but Scully wasn't here to do that for him. Her mother put her faith in him, to find her, just as he promised he would. When he received the call, his entire life was frozen, and his emotions were frantic. He needed answers, but he needed to see her. 

He rushed to the hospital, and his breath caught at the first glance of her. He became unruly to the staff about the details about her return. His thoughts sporadic, he raged about not having answers. It wasn't until he was being escorted out by security that he began to somewhat regain his composure. He knew he needed to calm down if he wanted to be on the inside of her medical condition, and controlled his temper. As the doctor explained the unusual comatose state that she was in, Mulder was beginning to lose faith about her recovery. He knew the bastards he battled were behind this, and there wasn't going to be a simple cure. 

She was still comatose, and he was spiraling down a darker path, facing off with the Cigarette Smoking Man. He wasn't sure if he just wanted answers, or had a death wish because she wasn't waking up. Scully's sister, Melissa, had told him what he didn't want to hear, and he was more annoyed, knowing she was right. Scully was weakening, and he was being selfish in his fight for the truth. He didn't have much time to spare, but he knew the only way to accurately express his feelings for Scully, was to let his emotions pour out through his pen. 

When he finished writing his letter, he hid it with the others in the frame, behind Samantha's picture. He grabbed his things, and made his way to the hospital, abandoning the battle he picked first hand. He knew that the most important thing in his life was laying in a hospital bed, fighting for her life. 

Arriving to the hospital, he sat at her bedside, and felt the immense guilt flowing through him. This wasn't supposed to be how their story played out, and he needed to let her know that he would always be there for her. 

"I don't know if my being here, will help bring you back...but I'm here." He said, letting his voice drift off. He felt foolish, speaking to her in this state, but smiled internally, thinking that he's always spoken to her when she couldn't actually hear him. Their relationship was built on encouraging sentiments to get them through their hardest times, and this was no different.

He gloomily made his way back to his apartment, and noticed the ransacked condition it was in. He honestly didn't care anymore, that wasn't his biggest concern. Mulder fell further into the darkness, sitting mindlessly in the shadowed apartment. He was only brought from his reverie by the beep of his voicemail. He sighed, and answered, not really wanting to talk to anyone. He never imagined this specific phone call could change his life forever. 

* * *

Scully had been awake from her coma for a few weeks, and was ready to get back to work. She felt that her recovery was long enough, and much to everyone's objections, she needed to distract herself from succumbing to her own emotions. Since she had been back entirely, her relationship with Mulder was at an awkward place. She felt that there were unspoken notions that were being avoided, and she didn't know how to approach them. She pushed past her own feelings, and was just happy to be working at his side again. 

He had been avoiding any more personal feelings while working together on their first case again, but he couldn't help being overbearing about her in the field. He desperately wanted to protect her in anyway he could manage, but knew she was too stubborn to fully oblige by his wishes. It was that persistence that he loved the most about her. 

"Will you at least let me go with you?" She asked sternly. 

"No." He said with finality to the conversation. 

"Look, I know what you're thinking, but you have to get past that, we both do. I'm back, and I'm not going anywhere." She said, assuring him of her place. He dismissed her notions, and asked her to finish the autopsy, attempting to keep her safe. 

Mulder ran off on his journey for answers, leaving her behind in the lab. He assumed she would be safest there, and was selfish enough to separate their small team. He knew she could sense that her safety was his top priority, but was unaware of the meaning behind it. He never wanted her to face that sort of danger again, not if he could prevent it.

After making their discoveries and finding some answers, he rushed back to Scully's side, realizing she was the one in imminent danger. When he arrived, he found her slumped on the floor, exhausted by the fight she clearly won. He leaned down, and brought his hand to her face to cradle it gently. 

"You alright?" He asked nervously, taking in the scene around him. 

"I'm okay." She said as she flashed him a small smile. She closed her eyes and let out a heavy sigh. He watched her, and already placed the blame on himself. He shakily unlocked the cuff on her wrist, and helped her to a standing position. He maintained his closeness, assuring himself that she was there, and alive. 

As they made their way home, he was quiet, attempting to keep his emotions in check. She could sense something had shifted in his mood, but was exhausted, and let it slide for now. She had felt slightly thrown off on this case, and wanted to mend their partnership. 

It wasn't until the next case they took that she felt their rhythm begin to find itself again. When they found themselves dining at the recommended restaurant in Wisconsin, he leaned forward, and wiped the sauce away from the side of her mouth. She smiled at the gesture, and knew their relationship was getting back on track. She knew they needed to talk about what they've been avoiding, but wanted to wait until the case was done. She didn't want to take anymore focus away from their work. 

After lighting the fire within Mulder with the information she had about the alien substance found, and following their main lead, she watched that light burn out at the lack of answers discovered. She knew that the John Doe that was shot, hopefully held the answers he was seeking, but they weren't able to fully control the situation to receive definitive responses. She didn't know how to get him out of this slump, but knew she needed to at least attempt something. 

They made their way home, and instead of him just dropping her off, she invited him up for a cup of coffee. He was apprehensive about the invite, and rather confused, but knew spending the time with her would hopefully shake him from the mood he was in. 

"Go ahead and make yourself comfortable, I'll put on the coffee." She said, smiling at him. He slumped on the couch, and threw his head back, exhausted from their latest excursion. 

"We don't do this enough." He said as she joined him on the couch.

"Do what, Mulder?" She asked, puzzled by what he was implying.

"I don't know, spend time outside of work together."

"Maybe because we are always working." She lightly teased at him.

"Touche, Scully." He said as a smirk reach his lips. He instantly had another thought, and his face fell. "You're not, uh, working too much right? I know we kind of went full force after you returned. The last thing I want to do is cause you to feel like you're overworking." He said frantically. 

"No, Mulder. I needed to return to work, it was best for me. You are not responsible for anything that had happened to me, or happens to me in the future. You do understand that, don't you?" She asked seriously. 

"I feel responsible. Scully, if you weren't involved in my constant, insane antics in search of the truth, nothing would have happened to you." 

"Don't. Don't blame yourself. I wouldn't even be here if it wasn't for you, I wouldn't have made it through half of the things in my life if it wasn't for you, in some weird cosmic way." She said in a hushed voice. 

"Scully, are you saying you're starting to believe in extreme possibilities?" He said teasingly, as his eyes gleamed. 

"I really need to stop spending so much time with you." She winced, before letting the smirk take over her face. He chuckled, basking in the ease of their growing relationship, and an idea popped in his head. He knew he couldn't mask his feelings for her, but didn't know how to express them with verbal sentiments. 

"You wound me, Scully. I think I should be heading home though, it was an exhausting week. I'll see you tomorrow?" He said as he began to gather his things and make his way to the door. 

"Oh, sure. I'll see you tomorrow. Goodnight, Mulder." She said in a small voice. She walked him to the door, and he stopped abruptly, turning to face her. She was startled by the sudden movement, and looked at him puzzled. 

"Thank you, for everything. I wouldn't be able to do any of this without you, and I don't always express that." He said in a whisper, his face lingering just above hers.

"Of course, Mulder. I wouldn't do this for anyone else, I hope you know that." She said softly. They just smiled at each other before he turned to finally make his exit. He was nervous about how to act on his feelings, but knew it was the necessary next step for them, eventually. 

* * *

As their cases whirled by, Mulder cowered further from expressing his true emotions to Scully. He was taking her sister's advice, and vowed to stop running from his feelings, for both of them. It wasn't until she was taken by Donnie Pfaster that he realized he might be too late. 

He mentally chided himself for allowing her to detach herself from him emotionally. As much as he attempted to unravel her inner sentiments, she kept avoiding the issue. Now that she was gone, again, he felt like he was losing himself. He had to compose his emotions, and put his energy towards his determination to find her. 

When the team found the house, he was first leading them into the chaos happening inside. As soon as he saw Scully, he immediately fell to her side and wanted to hold her, never letting her escape his grasp again. As he helped her finish removing the tie that held her wrists together, he glanced down and noticed the pain that she was fighting. 

"Sure you don't want to sit down, Scully, and let someone take a look at you?" He asked sincerely. He could feel her shaking from the altercation, fighting back her tears. 

"I'm fine, Mulder." She said in a small voice. He knew instantly that she was attempting to detach herself again, but he wasn't going to allow it, not this time.

He lifted her chin to lead her gaze to match his, and she couldn't fight the tears any longer. He pulled her into his arms, and held her tightly, letting her ride out her sobs. He could feel her finally relax into his embrace, and wrap her arms around his waist. He increased his hold on her, and gently caressed the back of her head for comfort. He leaned down and placed a gentle kiss to the top of her head. 

"It's all right." He whispered softly into her hair. They embraced deeper as the sobs racked through her. 

When she was finally able to subdue her emotions, she reluctantly separated from his embrace, and gave him a small smile that didn't reach her eyes.

"Thank you." She said in the small whisper. "I just want to get out of here." She said licking her lips subconsciously. 

"Scully, I don't want to overstep my bounds here, but I really think you shouldn't be alone right now." He said, rubbing her arms gently. 

"I'm fine." She said with her head down, avoiding his gaze. This was what she feared, him feeling as if he had to protect her. She finally looked up into his pained, worried eyes and knew she was wrong. He should have been the one she could confide in, he always was in some way before. "Okay..." She said in a hushed whisper. 

"Come on, I'll take you back to the motel. We're on the first flight out, I promise." He said as he guided her outside, placing his hand on her lower back. She just nodded at his compassionate sentiments, and allowed him to lead her. 

She knew she was being foolish in not informing Mulder about her apprehensions on this specific case, but she didn't want him to feel responsible for her. She also never wanted to fully emit her vulnerability. She was fearful about completely opening herself up to him, and allowing that last wall to be broken down. As ridiculous as that sounded, considering he was the one she ran to for all her major decisions, metaphorically speaking. 

They finally made it back to the motel, and her nervousness began to rise. She didn't have a room yet, because she never made it back from the airport, and wasn't sure how they were going to proceed. She anxiously waited in the car as Mulder went to the main office. He came back with a sheepish look on his face, and she let out a heavy sigh. She got out of the car to meet him walking towards her. 

"So, the room on the other side of my connecting door isn't available. There's no more with any connecting rooms open, but uh, there's a room with two beds available." He said looking down at the ground. She smiled at his flustered state, and secretly found it adorable. 

"That's fine, Mulder." She said, flashing him a small smile. "Lead the way." 

They made their way into the small room, and he situated his things on the bed closest to the door. She realized in this moment that her belongings had been held when they towed the car. She licked her lips nervously, not knowing what to do. 

"I checked already, and there's a flight early tomorrow morning. We can at least try to get a few ours of sleep." He said distractedly. 

"Uh, sure. I don't have any of my things with me, so we'll have to pick them up from the precinct before we go." She said in a small voice. 

"Oh, right. Uh, do you need something to sleep in? I'm sure you want to get out of those clothes. Scully, I'm sorry, I didn't even think about it. I can run down and get your things, or I-" He said with a heavy sigh. He was so concerned about getting her away from the horrific scene, he didn't think about all the small details. 

"I really just want to take a shower, and wash this entire night away. If you don't mind getting my things, I would appreciate it." She said, avoiding his eyes.

"Sure, Scully. You're, uh, going to be okay here by yourself right?" He asked cautiously. 

"I'll be fine." She said confidently. He sighed at her detachment, and she immediately felt guilty. She never wanted him to know how much all of this was affecting her, but she also couldn't pinpoint her apprehensions. "Thank you, for everything." She said with a small smile.

"No problem, Scully. I'll be back soon, call me, if you need anything, okay?" He said as he stepped towards her and rubbed his hands up and down her arms. She just nodded at him, and watched him leave the room. 

She let out a shaky breath, and made her way to the bathroom. She felt dirty and vulnerable from the events that transpired, and needed to wash away the day. The silence began to surround her, and the sound of the water amplified, causing her to slowly panic. She finished her shower, cutting it shorter than she anticipated, and wrapped the towel around her tightly. She sat on the end of her bed, and gripped onto her towel tighter, trying to hold back the tears that stung her eyes. Her hair was dripping around her, and she curled her legs up to her chest. She sat in the dim light of the room, not realizing that Mulder had made his return. 

"Scully...?" He asked cautiously as he entered the room slowly. He noticed her physical state, and the fear began to rise inside of him. He moved towards her slowly, and she jumped as he called out her name again.

"Jesus, Mulder!" She hissed, coming back to her surroundings. She let out a heavy sigh. "Sorry, I - I guess I just lost track of time." She said in a small voice.

"What happened?" He asked in a small, worried voice. He situated himself on the end of his bed, remaining as close to her as he thought would deem sufficient for both of them. 

"I don't know. I think the day finally caught up with me." She said, relaxing into more comfortable position. "Mulder, I never wanted you to doubt my ability to perform my job. I didn't want to express any vulnerability during this case, I didn't want to let you down." 

"Scully, hey..." He said, moving to sit next to her. "Without you, my work wouldn't even be valid. I would never doubt your ability to perform your job, you're the best part of this team, and that's a totally unbiased opinion." He said sincerely, she responded with a light chuckle. It made him smile, knowing that he could bring some small moment of joy to her. "It's okay to need people, to let them in. I hope you know you can tell me anything." He said as he kissed her temple softly. 

She nodded slightly, and avoided his gaze. He didn't want to push her too much, given the events of the day, but needed her to know how much he cared. He gave her a moment and escaped to the bathroom. She finally changed into her clothes, and climbed into bed, exhausted from day. He emerged from the bathroom, and settled into his own bed, they both subconsciously turned to face each other, and smiled at their actions. 

"Good night, Scully." He said, holding her gaze.

"Good night, Mulder." She said with a shy smile. "Thank you." She whispered before drifting off to sleep. 

* * *

They made their way home early the next morning, away from the darkness that they faced in Minneapolis, and there was a new presence about them in their partnership. He pulled up to her apartment, and she just sat in the car, not making a move to leave. He glanced over at her, and noticed that her hands were folded in her lap, and she was staring down at them stoically. 

"Do you need help carrying your things up?" He asked carefully. 

"Wh - what? Oh, no, I'll be fine. Sorry." She said, breaking from her trance. 

"You sure, Scully?" 

"Yes, I am. Thank you, again, for everything." She said as she grasped onto his hand, squeezing it in comfort for them both. He just nodded and flashed her a small smile. She reluctantly left the car, and made her way up to her apartment. 

He was amazed by her strength, and reveled in her willpower to move past these dark paths that he led her down. After this progression in their relationship, he knew it was time for her to know how he truly felt, to erase any doubt in her mind. He went to his apartment, and pulled the letter he wrote to her from behind the frame. At the time, it was the only way he knew how to express his thoughts to her, but after facing almost losing her again, he didn't want to waste any more time with things left unsaid. 

Within the next week, she arrived to the office, happy to be back in her familiar settings. Their office door was still locked, and she furrowed her brow in confusion. She always walked into Mulder's antics first thing in the morning, and it was eerily quiet. She let out a heavy sigh, and noticed an envelope on the desk. Her heart rate began to race as she glanced at the D.S. on the outside. She smiled at their familiar way to express their notions to each other. 

She made herself comfortable in the chair, and began to read her letter. She gasped at the date at the top, instantly recognizing it as part of her missing time. Her hand became shaky as she proceeded to read his personal thoughts.

_D.S.,_

_Your sister suggested that I come and speak to you in the hospital, they say you're weakening. As much as I would much rather sulk in my own feelings, and try to find the bastards who did this to you, I can't keep running from how I feel. Your sister was right, but don't tell her I said that. I promised your mom I would find you, and I don't know how much of my efforts actually brought you back, but it's brought just a sliver of hope into my life. I need you to wake up. I've felt so lost while you've been gone, and I've done some regretful things. As cheesy as it may sound, you really do make me a whole person. You're my validity for life, and I don't know how to handle losing you. You're strong, Scully, I know you can fight through this. I feel foolish, speaking to you in a letter, now having the pleasure to know you in my life, but this just feels right to me. Maybe one day, I'll let you read this, and you'll know how I feel. Although, if that day happens I've either ran off again and you're looking for clues, or you needed to hear these words. I hope by the time you do read this, I've been able to express these sentiments verbally, but I don't have as much faith in me as I do in you._

_F.M._

She re-read his words, and fought back the tears in her eyes. She knew their friendship was growing, which only made their partnership stronger, but she never imagined his devotion ran this deep. She let out a shaky sigh, and didn't realize him standing in the doorway. 

"Morning, Scully!" He said as he strolled into the office. She jumped at his voice, and wiped away the tear that escaped her eye. 

"Hey, I didn't hear you come in." She said, composing herself again. 

"It's what keeps the mystery alive." He said wagging his eyebrows at her. She knew he was trying to lighten the mood of his letter, using humor to mask any other emotions that dare to escape. 

"I - uh, I finished up the report yesterday, I just need your notes." She said passively. "I - I also got your letter." 

"Did you read it?" He asked, sticking his hands in his pockets.

"I did. Thank you..." She said in a small whisper. "Why, uh, did you never tell me this before?" 

"Well, while you were gone, I still felt you out there, and writing to you just made sense. It was like in high school, I knew you were out there for me, and writing to you was what got me through a lot of things. It just seemed the best outlet for me during that time. I don't really have any other explanation for it. I did, uh, tell you, kind of, when I went to visit you late, the night before you woke up." 

"I know, I could feel you, too. I think it's the strongest pull back that I had. Mulder, I know you blame yourself for what happened to me, but you can't. I believe in your strength to move past this, just as much as you believe in mine." She said with a small smile. 

"It's great to know that one of us has faith in me." He said as he moved towards her. He tucked a stray hair behind her ear, and smiled down at her. She licked her lips nervously at their new found closeness. "New case for us, Scully. How do you feel about witchcraft?" He said with a smug grin on his face. 

She smiled at his attempt to avoid their feelings, and knew it wasn't their time to confront them. She held onto his words, knowing she would be using this newest letter to get through days to come. Regardless of what path this partnership led them down, she knew they would always have each other. 

**Author's Note:**

> This is for the anon who asked for an AU high school fic, that could make it seem like Scully and Mulder knew each other before they met on the x-files. Don't know if this is what you wanted, but hope you enjoy anyway! I got a little carried away, this was totally only supposed to be a ficlet. 
> 
> I added another chapter on request! I think this is done, not sure though, let me know what you think!


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